You feel anxious about riding (before or while riding)
Perhaps, you feel your heart racing, your breathing shallow or your hands are shaking before a ride.
Maybe your body might freeze just thinking about riding—or moments after mounting your horse. I’ve been there.
Whether you’ve had a fall, been away from the saddle for months (or years), or are simply feeling overwhelmed by the pressure to ‘get it right,’ or ‘just get on’ , anxiety can take a real toll on your confidence.
Do you feel you need to push through, even though you’re scared.
Do you find yourself smiling through, pretend you’re are fine, but inside you are anxious?
I used to suffer from panic attacks before a ride, I can relate. So many women I work with feel the same way, so if that’s any reassurance you are not alone.
Feeling anxious around your horse, or while horse riding is common.
There is nothing wrong with you, It’s a nervous system response.
When you shift your perspective on why anxiety shows up—and learn to see it through a more compassionate lens—your entire riding journey begins to change.
Why You Feel Anxious in the Saddle
Overcoming anxiety is like overcome Anxiety is a symptom that your nervous system doesn’t feel safe.
Most riding anxiety doesn’t start in the arena.
It starts in your body.
Especially, if you’ve had a fall, a bad experience, or even felt pushed beyond your limits by a coach or friend, your nervous system holds onto that memory. It remembers what didn’t feel safe—and it’s doing its job to try and protect you.
That’s why when people say to you “just relax” or “get over it” can feel so infuriating. Because relaxing is impossible when your body doesn’t feel safe.
Your brain might say, “It’s just a ride,”
But your body says, “I’m in danger.”
It is very confusing!
It doesn’t matter if the danger is real or imagined—your nervous system reacts the same way, it reacts as you are under threat right now, even though noting is happing.
Your body might tenses, freezes, floods you with stress hormones, and prepares to flee or fight.
So the work isn’t just about becoming “braver” or ‘tougher’ or even more skilled rider.
It’s about helping your body feel safe again—with your horse, and with yourself.
5 Tips To Overcoming Anxiety While Riding
These tips will help you if you ride in the arena or on the trail, and they aren’t about pushing through. They’re about listening inward to your body—so you can build confidence from the inside out.
Btw, if you want to get tips specifically for trail riding – click here
1. Regulate Your Body Before You Ride
This is the basic for everything you do with your horse. As horses can sense if you are anxious or not, you want to learn how to regulate your nervous system, before, while and after the ride.
Remember: Don’t wait until you’re already overwhelmed in the saddle to try calming yourself down.
This is like any other skill, the more your practice, the more you can access it when you need it.
Let’s start on the ground, where it’s safer and slower.
Try simple, nervous system-regulating practices:
- Feel your feet firmly on the ground. Stand still for a moment, noticing where your weight is. Gently rock side to side if you feel frozen.
- Breathe out longer than you breathe in. Try inhaling for 4 counts, exhaling for 6. This slows your heart rate and signals your body that it’s safe.
- Use gentle self-touch. Tapping your chest or thighs or holding your hands over your heart can activate safety signals in your body.
Even just 3–5 minutes of this before you ride can dramatically reduce tension and help you connect to yourself—and your horse.
✨ Regulation is not about perfection. It’s about connection.
2. Set a Small, Safe Goal
Many riders feel anxious because they unknowingly pressure themselves to do too much, too soon.
You might tell yourself, “I have to ride for an hour,” or “I should canter today,” even when your body is saying, “I’m not ready.”
Instead of big goals, try this:
- 🐴 “Today I’ll just groom and tack up, and see how I feel.”
- 🐴 “I’ll get on, just sit, or walk around the arena, and dismount if I start to feel overwhelmed.”
- 🐴 “I’ll lead my horse in-hand while focusing on my breath and posture.”
These small goals are not setbacks. They are foundation-building.
They help you rebuild trust with yourself—and your horse—without pressure.
Over time, small successes stack up.
They become your new baseline of safety and capability.
3. Ride With Presence, Not Pressure
Anxiety thrives in “what if” thinking:
- What if my horse spooks?
- What if I fall again?
- What if people are judging me?
These thoughts pull you into the future—and disconnect you from the present.
But riding is a present-moment practice.
The next time you ride, try grounding yourself with simple awareness cues:
- 🐴 Notice your horse’s breathing. Is it soft and rhythmic?
- 🐴 Feel the rise and fall of your seat in the saddle.
- 🐴 Listen to the sound of hooves on the ground.
- 🐴 Name 3 things you see, 3 things you hear, and 3 things you physically feel.
This doesn’t erase fear—but it anchors you in the now, where you and your horse can connect more clearly.
And that’s where confidence lives.
4. Name the Fear—But Don’t Let It Lead
It’s okay to feel anxious.
It’s okay to say, “I’m scared right now.”
That’s not failure. That’s honesty.
The goal is not to eliminate fear completely. It’s to build a relationship with it where you lead, not the fear.
Ask yourself:
- Is my fear about what’s happening now, or something from the past?
- Am I responding to this moment—or a memory of when I didn’t feel safe?
- What is my fear trying to protect me from?
- What would help me feel 1% safer right now?
Maybe it’s asking someone to walk with you while you ride.
Maybe it’s taking a break and doing groundwork instead.
Maybe it’s simply putting a hand on your chest and saying, “I’m okay. I’ve got this.”
The moment you name your fear, you take back the power.
5. Get Support That Feels Safe
You don’t have to work through anxiety alone.
And you definitely don’t have to “tough it out” or “push through it”
In fact, many women I work with developed deeper anxiety after being pushed too hard by well-meaning instructors who said things like:
- “You’re fine—just do it.”
- “Don’t let the horse win.”
- “You just need more confidence.”
But if your body doesn’t feel safe, no amount of pushing will help.
In fact, it can reinforce the fear and leave you more disconnected.
Find someone who understands trauma, nervous system regulation, and what it’s like to rebuild trust in your body.
This could be a therapist, trauma-informed riding coach, or horseperson who respects your pace.
✨ The right support doesn’t push you past your limits. It helps you honour them.
If you’ve ever told yourself…
- “I should be over this by now.”
- “I’m so behind.”
- “Why can’t I just ride like I used to?”
Please hear this:
You are not too sensitive.
You are not too slow.
You are not behind.
You are a woman whose body is doing its best to protect her.
And that body deserves compassion, not criticism.
You are learning to feel safe again.
That is brave work. That is deep work.
And it’s work that will change your riding.
✨ What Healing Can Look Like
Each person defines ‘healing’ differently and that’s ok.
Sometimes healing looks like galloping across a field, laughing.
But sometimes, it looks like taking a deep breath at the mounting block and choosing to stay grounded.
Sometimes it looks like walking your horse on a loose rein for five quiet minutes.
Sometimes it looks like crying in the saddle, and not quitting.
Healing doesn’t follow a straight line.
But it does leave you stronger, softer, and more connected—to yourself and your horse.
Healing is about be present with your emotions, sit with them, without attaching any stories. There is no right or wrong.
❤️ Final Thoughts: The Dream Is Still Alive
You may have spent time, money, and energy on lessons, clinics, tack, gear—and still feel like fear is running the show.
You may even be wondering if it’s time to give up on riding.
But what if your fear isn’t telling you to quit?
What if it’s just asking you to slow down and feel safe again?
What if this moment—this pause—is not the end of your journey…
but the start of a whole new one?
One where you ride with presence, not pressure.
One where confidence is built from trust, not toughness.
One where fear becomes a companion—not a captor.
You don’t have to wait until you feel “brave enough.”
You can start take care of yourself right now.
Your horse isn’t waiting for the perfect rider.
They’re waiting for you.
Want help rebuilding your confidence and riding with less fear?
I offer trauma-informed support for women just like you—who love their horses but feel held back by anxiety, overthinking, or past experiences.
🧡 Reach out today and let’s take the next step together.
Abby Shpilman is a trauma therapist who specialised in helping female riders all across Australia to overcome fear, anxiety and self doubt.