Hi! I’m Abby Shpilman, a Trauma Therapist!
Back in 2019, I was struggling with anxiety and panic attacks that seemed to come out of nowhere.
Even being around my horse could make my heart race, my hands shake, and that familiar swarm of butterflies fill my stomach.
I remember standing by the mounting block, wanting so badly to ride, but feeling completely anxious. (I’ve been riding since I was 10 years old). My hands were shaking, and I had that familiar feeling of butterflies in my stomach.
My mind said, “You’re fine,” but my body said, “You’re not safe.”
And no matter how much I told myself to relax, my body wouldn’t listen.
For a long time, I believed that the only way to feel confident again was to push through.
I tried everything — lessons, clinics, mindset tricks — thinking if I just worked harder, the fear would eventually disappear.
But it didn’t.
Because fear isn’t a mindset problem — it’s a nervous system response.
When I finally stopped fighting the anxiety and started listening to what my body was trying to tell me, everything began to shift.
I learned how to regulate my nervous system, release the tension I’d been carrying for years, and rebuild trust — in myself and in my horse.
I quit the old way of “just get on and ride.”
This time, I focused on healing, not forcing.
On presence, not performance.
On creating safety, not chasing confidence.
And the result?
I didn’t just start riding again — I started enjoying it. Truly, deeply enjoying it.
That shift changed everything.
I felt calm walking into the paddock.
Grounded near the mounting block.
and for the first time in a long time — I felt present with my horse instead of trapped in my head.
And it wasn’t just me.
I’ve since helped hundreds of riders do the same — women who once felt anxious, disconnected, or ashamed of their fear — now riding with steadiness, joy, and confidence again.
